Nobody's perfect. We all make mistakes. Some worse than others. But if you post your "Ls" on Twitter, it's pretty much a given that you're gonna get roasted to a crisp if you have more than a handful of followers. Twitter's latest victim is Jonathan Kay, a writer for Quillette - an Australian publication that weirdly attracts both racists and liberals. But today we're here to talk about what Jonathan Kay did wrong, physically instead of morally.
Kay took to Twitter yesterday to innocently reveal that he had been using an Arm & Hammer dog shampoo for the past few months. At first, we were like "okay, maybe it looked like a human shampoo." But then we saw a photo of the pet grooming product and it has a very visible, very adorable dog on the packaging. And while Kay claims that "for pets" was in 4 point type. It's...definitely not. Needless to say, Twitter users were very, very quick to rail on the dude with roasts and amusing parodies. While it's true that his journalistic reputation didn't do him any favors, it's nice to see people roasting other people for doing something that is inane and fluffy. We just want to see a picture of how his hair looks now. Maybe using dog shampoo is the beauty hack we've been missing this whole time.
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so it turns out I've been using dog shampoo on my hair for the last few months. (I only discovered it when I ran out and needed to get more.) this is partly my own fault but it doesnt help that @ArmandHammer has the word "pets" in like 4-pt typeface. I'm guessing this is common pic.twitter.com/SHEaDrEW7J
— Jonathan Kay (@jonkay) January 31, 2021
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"but Jon, is has a pic of a dog!"
— Jonathan Kay (@jonkay) January 31, 2021
doesn't mean anything. Lots of shampoos i used in the past have pictures of waterfalls, or people cleaning dishes, or gauzily drawn women frolicking in pastures, or dudes under waterfalls with chests provocatively projected outwards, or whatever
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Thanks for proving that you got your job through nepotism
— I'm Cold, Bitch Li'l 🌲listen to @onbeliefpod (@karengeier) January 31, 2021
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so how bad does your scalp smell that you needed Advanced Odour Control, Jon?
— I'm Cold, Bitch Li'l 🌲listen to @onbeliefpod (@karengeier) January 31, 2021
5. Seth Rogen, reporting for duty.
you’re stupid.
— Seth Rogen (@Sethrogen) January 31, 2021
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"I'm guessing this is common"
— Dr Kyle 🌱 (@KylePlantEmoji) January 31, 2021
Buddy, it is not
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There’s a fucking dog on it dude. I wouldn’t have shared this information with the public
— jenna (@JennaPie) January 31, 2021
8. Get Jon an ice pack!
One time you DM’ed me and tried to get me to write for Quillete and I didn’t know what that was but I said no because you seemed like a stone cold freak show and I was right.
— Respectable Lawyer (@RespectableLaw) January 31, 2021
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it's not jon's fault, antifa & cancel culture mob tricked jon into using dog shampoo & eating dog food
— saeen (@conceptualsaeen) January 31, 2021
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I thought this was honey. Been using it in my tea. Should I sue Top Paw 🐾? pic.twitter.com/WBREzqoghR
— Christina Sommers (@CHSommers) February 1, 2021
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???????? pic.twitter.com/ozMCCJQx1V
— The Young HegATLiens ✡️🔥🤦🏽♂️ (@EvelKneidel) January 31, 2021
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I have never come across a product with a picture of a dog on the front that wouldn’t make me pause and think “is this for dogs then”
— James Felton (@JimMFelton) January 31, 2021
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so it turns out I've been eating mealworms for the last few months. (I only discovered it when I ran out and needed to get more.) this is partly my own fault but it doesnt help that @Flukers
— @NINELIVES (@NINELlVES) January 31, 2021
has the words “for bearded dragons" in like 4-pt typeface. I'm guessing this is common pic.twitter.com/cNqSsmTaNu
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I’m genuinely impressed you didn’t find a way to blame this on trans people before blurting this out
— Emistablishment shill (@EmilyGorcenski) January 31, 2021
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The Intellectual Bark Web https://t.co/2Cab7clUD3 pic.twitter.com/XI46tLlNzG
— David Allsopp (@doublehelix) January 31, 2021
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Ugh, tell me about it. This can didn't even say "for pets" anywhere! pic.twitter.com/IgKfcvG9ja
— President Ghidorah (@jotaele_emea) January 31, 2021
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Boy I'll bet the people at arm and hammer feel like idiots now.
— Imbolg Celebrator (@kliksf) January 31, 2021
18. And then users started bringing up his politics.
Before everyone goes all, "Awwww, that's cute."
— DR. Waitman Wade Beorn (Amputate to heal) (@waitmanb) January 31, 2021
Turns out @jonkay is...pretty awful. pic.twitter.com/r91Ty38joN
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He's not himself when he's hungry.
— JAKearney (@lingerence) January 31, 2021
He needs a snack. pic.twitter.com/PRxUs9ytgN
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finding out the dog shampoo guy is a quillette editor really elevates the whole thing
— Lauren (not a hologram) (@ActNormalOrElse) January 31, 2021
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the minds at Quilette once again exploring dangerous ideas, like why there’s a picture of a dog on this shampoo that’s clearly for humans pic.twitter.com/NHawSh6xxW
— ska scholar (@CTWritePretty) January 31, 2021
22. But at the end of the day it's really all about the laughs.
If I were accidentally using dog shampoo for months, one thing I might do to avoid being embarrassed about it is not announce it
— JP (@jpbrammer) January 31, 2021
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