Partners Of Sleep Walkers And Talkers Share Amusing Anecdotes

If you've ever dated or married a sleep walker or talker, you know that nights can be anything but boring. Reddit user u/hoeka_mos made this extra clear after asking the r/AskReddit if the partners of weird sleepers had any wild stories to tell. The community came through with some incredibly entertaining tidbits that make us wonder if our sleep cycles could survive such excitement. Here are our favorites.  

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Text - Posted by u/hoeka_mos 6 days ago 2 9 43 43 58 3 53 37 70 59 Partners of sleep-talkers or sleepwalkers, what gems have you to share?

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Text - BetamaxTheory 5.0k points · 6 days ago 2 My wife will tell me the next day when I do this. Her favourite story to tell is that she woke up in the middle of the night to find me slowly walking out of our bedroom. Wife: "Are you ok? What are you doing?" Me: "There's somebody downstairs in the kitchen, unrolling the tinfoil" Wife: "Ooooo-Kay. What's your plan?" Me: "I'm going to stop them" Wife: "Shall we get a bit more sleep then both go down together?" Me: "Ok". And I went back to bed. Sub

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Text - dadjokedame 5.7k points · 6 days ago 3 & 4 More He farted very loudly and proceeded to say, "you got the wrong guy"

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Text - JWolf886 8.0k points · 6 days ago My girl woke up one night and said "Did you find your rocks?" and I asked her what she was talking about and she said "I don't know, I'm just trying to make conversation." and promptly went back to sleep. She has no recollection of this.

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Text - liv832 4.7k points · 6 days ago 3 My boyfriend woke me up the other day by gently putting his fingers in my mouth and I kept moving my head out of the way until eventually I was like "can you stop that!!" He then sounded genuinely upset and asked why I woke him up as he was having a really nice dream about feeding a deer. Brilliant.

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Text - quackcurls 8.6k points · 6 days ago N e a Sigh; my boyfriend either recites postcodes (delivery driver) or calls the dog in his sleep. So either he is mad no one is responding to his postcode nonsense or I get a flying 30kg dog to my body

7.

Text - stunninglizard 709 points · 6 days ago Not my current partner but my ex-boyfriend sometimes talks in his sleep and the funniest story was this one time i was still up reading a book and i hadn't noticed that he was already asleep next to me. Suddenly he bursts out" Will you just give me the fucking yogurt already, Shannon!?" in a flawless british accent and scares the shit out of me. We're both german and none of our first languages include English. We didn't know a Shannon. He's lactose-

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Text - eyeslikeacrab 24.9k points · 6 days ago 3 & 25 More Fantastic sleep songs with lyrics which are utterly bizarre. My two absolute favourites have been 1. "Oh whoa whoa, it's a corner cat" 2. "Obey my rules, an' you'll always be, a country cowboy" - repeated about 5 times and finished with a "yeaaahhhh."

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Text - Thud4444-1 14.3k points · 6 days ago N & 15 More My wife started screaming one night that she was lost in the local grocery store. And that no matter where she went she couldn't find her way out. I asked her has she tried checking out at the cash registers? She then looked at me and said in her most sincere voice, "that's why you are the smartest person I know." And she rolled over and fell back asleep.

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Text - Cocamello 11.8k points · 6 days ago 3 2 & 3 More My grandfather was a hard sleep talker , my grandmother has a funny story. One day my grandfather while sleeping was saying" do i punch this asshole" my grandmother replayed yeah punch him then my grandfather in his sleep punched her.

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Text - TerryTheOctopus 1.4k points · 6 days ago · edited 6 days ago My girlfriend once yelled in her sleep "no No NO you SPUNKY LESBIAN" I'm a dude still tease her about it

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Text - tipskid 5.9k points · 6 days ago Not a partner but..1 o'clock in the morning I got a phone call from my friend in the next street. My 6 year old daughter had just knocked on her door and then walked in mumbling about not being able to do her sums! I raced up there and walked home with her, put her back to bed and she didn't wake up or remember a thing the next day.By the next night our house was like Fort Knox!!! scherster 2.7k points · 6 days ago Reminds me of my sleepwalking incident. W

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Text - airtightwoodendoors 4.0k points · 6 days ago My Mrs called me a wriggly little enzyme while she w sleeping. I've never ever heard her use that word before ffcruz85 141 points · 6 days ago Is she a biologist or something? airtightwoodendoors 159 points · 6 days ago No I asked her the next day and she was unaware what an enzyme was lol

14.

Text - bahumutx13 13.3k points · 6 days ago 2 2 4 & 7 More Not a partner but in military training and school I often took the night shift for guard duty. The amount of sleepwalkers and talkers is way fucking higher than I expected. It is straight creepy when you have to walk down the halls with a covered flashlight listening to big-ass grown men mumbling and lashing out in their sleep. What takes the cake though is often sleepwalkers will just kinda stop randomly. So you'll be walking along in t

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Text - PersephoneRules 6.8k points · 6 days ago Husband woke up in the morning and told me about a crazy dream he had: we were hosting a party and he was serving cookies. He was upset that nobody was eating them. When we went downstairs, we discovered a full plate of cookies sitting on our dining table.

16.

Text - panicked228 38.1k points · 6 days ago · 5 & 16 More edited 6 days ago i We were freshly married and living overseas. My husband hadn't had much sleep the nights before, which usually enhances any sleep talking. It was hot in our room. My husband mumbled something which I didn't quite catch. I asked him to repeat it. He got up, opened the bedroom window and said very pointedly "Air flow, Bitch!" then laid back down, completely asleep. Now, my husband has never, not once, ever called me a n

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Text - bananacumshake 1.7k points · 6 days ago Not my partner, but my mom. She talks and moves a lot during the night. Last week she started running while laying down (yes, just like dogs do) and also screaming "get out of the way, get out of the way!". I woke up in the other room to the sound of my dad first wondering what the fuck was going on and then laughing his ass off when he was telling me what had just happened.

18.

Text - gas_brake_dip 338 points · 6 days ago I once walked into the kitchen late at night to see my husband, wearing his shirt partially off, like a shrug jacket thing, underwear around his ankles, trying to pee into an open dishwasher full of clean dishes. I shook him awake (before the dishes got a golden rinse cycle) and he had no idea what was going on, he was dreaming he was on a boat...

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Text - texst 259 points · 6 days ago My Chinese college roommate (he speaks good English but has a fairly thick accent) once sat up in bed, said in perfect, clear, American accented English, like a 30s radio announcer, "what a beautiful creature," and went right back to sleep.

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Text - heylookasportsgirl 107 points · 6 days ago Husband sleep snacks pretty regularly. My favorite: we had some modeling clay leftover from a project and made little clay figures of our college mascots. Found one with a clearly bitten off piece missing from it one morning. We think he thought it was candy but he doesn't remember so we'll never know.

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Text - Darksnauw 192 points · 6 days ago My girlfriend once said "We are in the land of whales. I can see them everywhere", then after a while "The whale Hanna and the whale Lea" These are her sisters, who are rather fat :')

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Text - gypsyminded1 52 points · 6 days ago My husband muttered "But I don't want to wear a leotard". My husband is a freaking viking at 6"2 and 275, so picturing this image, I burst out laughing which woke him up.

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Text - ceb79 51 points · 6 days ago Wife is speaking gibberish then starts quietly laughing. I say, "what's so funny?". She laughs again for a second then disdainfully says, "your mom." Promptly rolls back over and goes to sleep.

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Text - sweetcharity03 19 points · 6 days ago My husband..as if he was talking on the phone with someone: Did he make it? Is it a peanut? Is his better or mine better? Oh dang! He blew mine out of the water. Alright

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Text - GuineapigsRB 5.5k points 6 days ago · edited 6 days ago My mum who is in her 80s, often falls asleep in her chair while I'm visiting her. She sleep eats. Not real food but she goes through the motions of holding a plate and bringing food to her mouth. It's hilarious watching her. I asked her once if it was nice and she said yes it's very tasty.

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