Smartasses Who Did The Math For The Sake Of A Joke

High school math teachers are always talking about how wonderful and useful algebraic equations are, but I bet if teachers told their students they could use math for epic punchlines or to totally own people online, the kids would pay closer attention in class. Whether you're a huge math nerd or you love to see people drop witty comments they obviously spent way too long crafting, you'll surely be into these internet moments of smartassery. r/theydidthemath is a goldmine of mathematical zingers, so be sure to check out the sub.

1.

Text - WINGS 4 Chicken Wings 4.55 24 Chicken Wings 27.25 27.80 5 Chicken Wings 6 Chicken Wings 7 Chicken Wings 25 Chicken Wings 26 Chicken Wings 5.70 6.80 28.95 7.95 27 Chicken Wings 30.10 8 Chicken Wings 9.10 28 Chicken Wings 31.20 9 Chicken Wings 10.20 29 Chicken Wings 32.35 33.50 30 Chicken Wings 35 Chicken Wings 10 Chicken Wings 11.35 11 Chicken Wings 12.50 39.15 40 Chicken Wings 45 Chicken Wings 44.80 12 Chicken Wings 13 Chicken Wings 13.60 14.75 50.50 50 Chicken Wings 55.60 14 Chicken Wing

2.

Cartoon - Maintain social distancing 6 feet 6 feet 6 feet 6 feet 6 feet 6 feef @official mathematics lovers Calm down, Pythagoras, calm down

3.

Text - Hi DARLING. UsE MY ATM CARD, TAIKE ANY AMOUNT DUT, GO SHOPPING AND TAKE Youg FRIENDS FOR LUNCH PIN CODE, 3x-X+2x-4)dx Vx 3x+2 I LoVE YOu HONEY VISA

4.

Text - SAW SOMEONE WITH A SHIRT SAYING: TRUTH + GOD = LIFE I HOPE THEY REALIZED THAT IT ALSO FOLLOWS... TRUTH = LIFE - GOD GOD = LIFE - TRUTH %3D %3D SERIOUSLY, DO THE MATH PEOPLE.

5.

Hair - Barber: What you want, fam? Him: Let me get that "y = mx + b" Barber: Say no mo. skeptical-ish: that is exponential growth which is y=ab^x so you are wrong and you have failed

6.

Text - PAIN The average kitchen sponge weighs around 2oz. The weight of a teddy bear is around 10oz. 2 bears plus a bar (let's assume plastic) is in the ballpark of 22oz. That's 11x's his body weight. Average male weight is 197lbs. x11 = 2,167lbs ya boi just cleaned seconds after waking up. %3D A rreallivezombiee 3d

7.

Text - r/Coronavirus + JOIN u/faab64 · 3h 1 1 Pakistan hired 63,000 people, unemployed by COVID-19, to help plant 10 billion trees South & SE Asia upworthy.com 14.9k 356 Share Award BEST COMMENTS CoanReddit • 2h Damn, that's over 150 000 trees per person, given that they plant all the trees. Might seem like a lot, but if it takes about 30 seconds to plant a tree and they work eight hours a day, it would only take 160 work days. Reply ...

8.

Text - sonicunleashed me:*fills a water gun with printer ink* me:i dont even need a wii u to have fun gembondings if you bought a 16ml cartridge of ink at $18, and a 2500ml nerf super soaker barrage at $15.99, it would cost about $2,828.49 to fill it with ink once wichatime

9.

Text - soul nate @MNateShyamalan "Baby Nut" was born Feb 2, 2020, the superbowl. on Aug 11th, the Mr. Peanut corporation tweeted a video for his 21st birthday. thus, he ages at a rate of 0.109375 years/day. average male life expectancy is 67-88 years. Baby Nut will likely die between Oct 6, 2021 & April 16, 2022

10.

Text - Deathstroke @_d34th5trOk3 "It costs $0 to retweet ..." Actually, an average retweet costs like 2kb, I buy 100gb at $46.70 hence | need about $0.000011208 to retweet your tweet Name St... Type Initiator Size T.. Waterfall o retweet.json 200 fetch service... 1.9 kB 3...

11.

Text - Perkele!! There are allegedly around 6.5 million Finns, right? That's out of a 7.125 billion humans. That means Finns make up .0912% of the planet. That's not 9%-that's point zero nine percent, less than a percent, less than a tenth of a percent. To put that another way, 99.9% of the planet are not Finns. How do we know this? Government censuses. Now, the best government censuses have a margin of error of at least 1%. So Finns make up .0912% of the planet, plus or minus one percent. In co

12.

Text - 7h · O wtf did we learn y=mx + b for ? O Like Comment Share 3 Comments 1 Share 1 Share Let's say you pay $10 to get in the club and each drink that night is $5 and You only got $50 for the night. The equation would be $50=$5x +10 in this situation you solve for x and that's the number of drinks you can have (slope) Oh, it's beautiful.

13.

Logo - -Mach line a = tan(1/4.83) 11.7° Mo = 1/sin(a) - 4.93 a Shock Interaction 1 4.83 -Normal Shock Oblique Shock UNITED STATES POSTAL SERVICE ®

14.

Text - Best investment ever We pay my oldest $1 every time he reads a book. We're talking 160 page chapter books. I'm out $120 this year and he thinks he's ripping me off. Best investment ever. grateshirtironer · 6h Damm, what is that? It is day 199 of this year, 199÷7~28.4 weeks 28.4x5=142 working days 142×24=3408 hours 3408(1/3)=1136 working hours $120/1136~10c an hour 106

15.

Text - "How many communions do you have to do before you've eaten a whole Jesus?" -Seffrey Dakmer 17 14 Comments Like Comment View 3 more comments Thomas Madia OK, despite the disgust from others posting I really was interested to know and gave it a lot of thought. I even did the math. If my math is correct that is. We are assuming we are dealing with a Jesus who is about 5'10 and let's says 140 lbs bone dry. If each Jeezit weighs approximately .25g (As indicated online) you would have to eat ro

16.

Text - global average penis size is increasing with every passing day 3.2k 96 1 Share Award BEST COMMENTS The_Russian_Spi • 9h• Gay Jewish Black Trans Pantheist Mine brings it down single handedly by 50 percent 6 Reply 209 BurnmaNeeGrow• 3h•I'm fucking gay 3 2 Awards i did the math, and since the average penis length is 5.1 inches and there are 3.9 billion men on earth, in order to bring it down to 5.1 inches from 10.2 inches, your penis would have to be -19,890,000,000 inches in length, which i

17.

Text - Kyle I remeber when I was 17 and thought $100 was a lot of money 25m Like Reply Kyle Kylel IU me too. $100 is tissue money 22m Like Reply Kyle : Kyle tissues costs $2.50 and contains 65 tissues. Assuming you're am average American and make -$50,000 - $60,000 a year then the cost of one tissue is approximately 1.3 millionth of your annual income. Extrapolate the data so that one facial tissue the average box of facial would cost $100 and you'd have to be making $130,000,000 a year for $100

18.

Text - nerdgul Your average pineapple, peeled and cut makes about 4.5 cups or 36 ounces of pineapple chunks. Cans of pineapple come in a variety of sizes the most common being 20oz and 46oz. Meaning a single pineapple generally won't fill up a single can perfectly, wich also means everytime u eat pineapple from a can somewhere someone else has the can that has the rest of that same pineapple. Meaning u can share a single fruit with a stranger from hundreds of miles away and I think that's beutif

19.

Text - 00000 02-UK 3G 12:42 pm 79 000 02-UK 3G 12:42 pm 79% Q Search Q Search Louis Bosley added 42 new photos to the album Salcombe - Exam leave. Saturday at 5:05 pm t 14 boys/31 gallons of budweiser/5days Like Comment Share Liv Harvey and 6 others like this. Doug Jefferis 31 Gallons = 248 pints 248 pints between 14 boys =17.7 pints per person 17.7 pints over 5 days= 3.5 pints You guys had 3.5 pints each day, it must have been fucking wild. Yesterday at 9:52 pm Unlike 6 19 Write a comment... Wr

20.

Text - Connor isn't here to fuck around ie Like Comment Share O+0 122K 105,683 shares tbh if had a $1 for every time i've listened to closer by the chainsmokers i could probably afford that rover they be Clinton Gierke Abbie Rochon 2 hours ago Like Reply talkin bout Connor Oliver False. A new range rover is $41,800 (according to google) so you would need to listen to that song 41,800 times. The song is 4:04 in length or 244 seconds. This means you would need to spend 10199200 seconds listening t

21.

Text - 00:20 l 70% r/AskReddit Posted by u/idontthinkthisisgary • 3h If you had a button, that when pressed would give you $100 but shorten a random person's life on this world by 30 days, how many times would you press it? 8.2k 1.7k Share Award JI TOP COMMENTS shududemonas • 3h • Where does one get an auto clicker? VictosVertex 3h A 1 Award According to the worldometer website the current population is roughly at 7,769,005,500. If we assume I have roughly 20 people I care about then the probabi

22.

Text - 08:56 O X ll 52% Tweet Trevor Collins @_TrevorC In my lifetime, I've likely eaten a full cow's worth of meat by now, right? 15:53 · 16 Jul. 20 · Twitter Web App 58 Retweets and comments 2,158 Likes Jason Langley @JSquatch96 · 16h Replying to @_TrevorC The average annual consumption of beef in America is around 57 pounds. The average steer weighs 1450 pounds. It would take you over 25 years to consume that much beef. Toddlers typically eat 1/4 of an adult portion, children 1/3, preteens 1/

Submitted by:



from Memebase https://ift.tt/3frvgUR

Post a Comment

0 Comments