Spicy Comebacks And Insults That Hit Different

Some insults are just so beautifully poetic that you can't even be mad about them. All you can really do is nod your head and say, "touche" while you stare off pensively into the distance. The following examples demonstrate flawless execution, grace, and poise and we certainly think they're deserving of our recognition!

1.

Text - r/RoastMe u/Hilario_5 7h http://redd.it/b5a603 I'm a programmer and my only two friends date each other. Do your worst 4ME Share 2.2k 306 BEST COMMENTS SGTwhocares 3 3h Your parents dont count as friends Reply 3.0k

2.

Text - r/Jokes u/HornyLogician 15 The skip intro button on Netflix is so cool. I wish tinder had it too. 356 24.7k Share BEST COMMENTS Unbanlncels 12h Straight to unmatching eh? Reply 635

3.

Hair - i DAILYSQUAT.COM Man drugged and robbed by Cardi B says it was still better than listening to her music

4.

Text - venice witch Follow @horchataqween Today at Walmart this girl ahead of me in line card kept declining. So the cashier offered to pay for it. She told him " HaVE A BOyfRIEnd"...and the cashier legit told her "I'm tryna hurry home and watch some basketball rn, not date your broke ass. 10:32 PM-21 Feb 2019 30,506 Retweets 208,030 Likes t 31K 208K 265

5.

Text - Airtel 12:23 AM 67% My momma graduated medical school pregnant with me so TECHNICALLY i got a Nusing degree.. i was listening to them lectures too 1:54 PM 20 Mar 19 from Brenham, TX Twitter for iPhone 27.9k Share 397 TOP COMMENTS defNOTabrokestudent 6h Medical school isn't nursing school. Jfc Reply 3.1k DigNitty S 6h It's so entitled when med students already call themselves doctors or art students already call themselves baristas. Add a comment

6.

Text - o Frezia 4G 5:37 PM 64% Messages Laurence Details Dude me and Nick are about to go to a giants game, wanna come? It's Nick and I... It's Nick and I. "Me and Nick" is not proper grammar, you Neanderthal. You're right. It is Nick and I, because you're no longer invited.

7.

Text - r/unpopularopinion Posted by 23h 15 dollar minimum wage is outrageous. Discussion no way no how no possibility. You shouldn't be paided enough to buy a buy a luxury car if you work at walmart! These people are entitled trash, they think they deserve to earn as much as people with a master's degree, when they probably dropped out of high school because they're lazy! Share Vote 56 BEST COMMENTS 23h Hi everyone! Please make sure t... AutoModerator 23h You're being pretty judgemental about hi

8.

Text - Jack Dayton @ltsJackDayton ALD How do you sleep at night knowing that there are some people in the world who don't like you? Jim Carrey @JimCarrey With no underwear in case they want to kiss my ass.

9.

Text - One year anniversary of our friendship. Make us regret it. HURLEY E-TR19 MCI EV3N ODDS TRoastNe waterdaemon 2h Three guys chipped in on a Nicolas Cage sex doll Reply

10.

Text - 5:53 PM o Verizon 4G 58% Messages Kylie Details Words can't describe how ugly you are Words can't describe how beautiful you are Aww thx But numbers can 3/10 DESTRUCTION 100

11.

Text - r/AskReddit u/aaredmi 20h What was your wittiest comeback that you're still proud of? Discussion 會 13.8k Share 5.8k BEST COMMENTS 16h cocoamoko Working at a pizza shop, troublesome customer tries to stack coupons that clearly state "One coupon per purchase". After being refused by everyone in the restaurant including the owner, he goes on a tirade saying that the District Attorney is his cousin, and was threateneing a lawsuit (lol). As he was heading for the door, he said "You can't affor

12.

Text - MacRobinson Anele Follow Mac9ja Replying to @halace3 @renoomokri God meant for women to be more chaste if not he would have created a means for checking men's virginity 6:38 AM-13 Feb 2018 jenjersnap and milk 100% funded Follow Jen Sime Replying to @Mac9ja @halace3 @renoomokri Luckily we developed Twitter so we can just read tweets like these to tell when you're a virgin 8:42 AM- 16 Feb 2018 from Ramblewood, NJ 271 Retweets 5,328 Likes t 271 65 5.3K

13.

Text - angry deer neckbread Follow babysitting and the four year old asked why i'm getting married. told her bc i'm in love and i'm gonna make cute babies like her. she straight up looked at my face and said "don't ever bring your gross babies into my nice house" 6:24 PM 12 Jan 2019 10,846 Retweets 129,460 Likes 11K 83 129K 52 Tweet your reply angry deer@neckbread Jan 12 update: when I checked twitter just now, she Once Again looked straight at me and said "god Clara you're so boring on your stu

14.

Formal wear - LADBIBLE.COM Jennifer Lopez Says Men Are Useless' Until They Turn 33 13K 8.6K comments 1.5K shares Like Comment Share Most relevant Write a comment... GIF By all means, let's give a damn about relationship advice from a woman that collects engagement rings like she's Thanos 15K Haha Reply 8h

15.

Transport - Adam Tranter @adamtranter 28 Jul 2017 @chrishoy Hi Chris, when I grow up I'd like to have a train named after me too Any tips? (Can't involve cycling fast) Britain'sFaster Sir Chris Hoy Triple Olympic Gold Medalist Beijing 2008 SOutheasternae.co 9 t1.1K 1.4K Chris Hoy @chrishoy Follow Replying to @adamtranter I thought you already did? Virnin 8:10 AM 28 Jul 2017 10,805 Retweets 35,414 Likes 162 11K 35K

16.

Text - arex 1m Had my IQ test today. Scored a perfect 100 Share Vote 1 BEST COMMENTS marshmellowtank Now 16 When do you plan on using it? 1 Edit

17.

Text - Mayor of Ikotun @badt BOI Follow I agree, I mean your father could've used a condom, but here you are. #TheBigOBook @Oloni Repeat after me.. men are stupid. Show this thread 11:07 AM 17 Mar 2019 from lkotun, Nigeria 6,923 Retweets 12,132 Likes t 6.9K 466 12K

18.

Text - r/AskReddit Posted by 4h There's over 7 billion people in the world. What is one (realistic) thing that you think not a single one of them is doing right now? Discussion Share t44 89 BEST COMMENTS Dating you Reply 166 4h Add a comment >>

19.

Text - I found out that my son is going to try and get himself vaccinated when he turns 18 in a month. How can I stop him? Claire Jordan, worked at National Health Service Answered 1h ago Accept that you have raised a son who is more intelligent than you

20.

Text - Angelo @Daddy_Lopez55 There should be a zoo of drunk white people doing stupid shit Tom Schally @TomSchally It's called Florida

21.

Text - now SNAPCHAT YOU MATCHED WITH CONNOR ON 06/04/2019. You shag cows Sent Today 14:43 Only shag two legged cows So it's your lucky day

22.

Text - 8h Clearly, I can tell your pretty young. You don't know how to type a proper sentence, you probably just came cause your duo went AFK in Fortnite and your salty about it. t3 Reply 8h first,english is not my first language, and it wasn't a Fortnite duo by the way if you're talking about my english: you're* salty 7

23.

Text - Seth MacFarlane @SethMacFarlane Apr 7 It is officially time to retire tweets and memes that begin with "no one: 1.2K t 3.9K 34K Robert Pellechio Follow @phantomlover90 Replying to @SethMacFarlane No One: @SethMacFarlane: It is officially time to retire tweets and memes that begin with "no one:" 11:17 PM -7 Apr 2019 220 Retweets 4,238 Likes t 220 4.2K 22

24.

Text - An avg white girl can survive between 21 days without food, 3 days without water but I wonder how long can she survive without attention 0:25 23 Mar 19 Twitter for iPhone 1 Like 1d I'd assume marginally longer than you can

25.

Text - tori Follow @tori_somerss bf took me to get undies n he wanted to embarrass me so he said real loud: "i can't wait to rip these off with my teeth" n i replied with: "seriously u need to stop, ur my brother" i won 7:22 PM-3 Jul 2018 75,271 Retweets 549,584 Likes t 75K 746 550K

26.

Tortoise - WHO TF LEFT THIS ON MY CAR IN LOT 301 JUST WANNA TALK Many three year olds have trouble staying within the lines. Maybe if you practice coloring this turtle, it will help with your parking

Submitted by:



from Memebase https://ift.tt/37rojBu

Post a Comment

0 Comments